Baby cries are often a source of stress and anxiety for parents, yet they are the means of communication for these little beings. They have no tools other than crying to express their emotions.
Understanding baby crying
When your child cries, you must first check that he is not hungry, that he is clean, and that he is not in pain. Once these actions have been carried out, it is an emotion and not a fundamental need, it will therefore be a question of seeking to accompany him by letting him express this emotion.
We have not been trained to receive the emotions of others and these can make us feel uncomfortable and cause us to get emotional.
In this sense, we will seek to stop the emotion and silence it by using all possible means to calm our baby. Therefore, we never learn to understand the crying of our babies.
The stress and anguish of parents caused by crying babies often lead to a lack of consistency in the desire to do well to soothe their child.
Babies are very connected to the emotions of the adults around them and this is often the reason why crying is difficult to limit.
It is in us parents that babies find their security, if they feel we are worried, anxious about something of which they are not aware of, they will feel completely insecure and express it by crying.
Why do children and babies cry?
Crying makes babies feel more relaxed because with tears our body releases toxins like cortisol while secreting endorphins and natural painkillers.
Allowing the child to free himself from all the stress he has accumulated and to express his emotions is also giving him the opportunity to understand how his emotions work and to learn how to manage them.
Learn to recognize his emotions and learn to find comfort on his own and know how to call on the adult when he really needs it. All this will also allow him to grow his self-confidence.
Another current of thought seeks to make parents believe that the crying of babies, sometimes even barely out of the maternity ward, is in fact a whim and that they have the ability to play their parents.
It is sad to imagine that such a young child can manipulate his parents when in reality he is simply trying to convey a message to the adults around him.
A baby crying isn’t bad
It is therefore essential to deconstruct everything that is anchored in us concerning baby crying. We should no longer see babies crying as something negative but as something essential to their emotional well-being.
Oxytocin is a hormone that we hear a lot about, it also plays an important role in limiting baby crying. Its production increases when the baby is in contact with one of the parents and even more when he’s in the arms of the mother.
How do you stop a baby from crying for no reason?
The best way to limit the crying of babies is to allow them to have quality sleep and in sufficient quantity for their age. A sleep-deprived baby finds it difficult to manage the surrounding stimuli, but also and above all his emotions.
Baby’s crying will immediately intensify as soon as he has not had enough sleep for his age. Awake times also play an indispensable role in sleep consistency.
Other ways to soothe a crying baby are:
- Give your baby a pacifier
- Put the baby on his back and let him cry for a while
- Let your baby fall asleep on you by rocking him gently back and forth in your arms or by patting his back gently with your hand. This can help you to calm down and fall asleep as well if you are tired yourself.
Sleep to regulate emotions
When a baby has too long an awake time, it will be very difficult to let go of sleep. Indeed, he is overstimulated and will express it by intense and inconsolable crying.
Known as discharge cries, they are actually the cries of an overstimulated, exhausted baby with a completely disconnected brain. The best way to accompany the baby’s crying in these moments would simply be to let him discharge his excess of cortisol, in your presence, then do everything possible so that he can fall asleep.
A baby who sleeps in sufficient quantity for his age, over long periods of sleep, and in deep sleep will really be better able to control his emotions, frustrations, and all the stimulations of daily life.
The relationship to adopt with your baby
Talking to the baby about the things that make us anxious, without necessarily going into details, can really be a key to accompanying the newborn towards an understanding of what he feels through you.
We agree that a newborn infant does not yet understand the meaning of words, but he understands the intention that you are going to put into your words and that is what he needs to feel safe.
Certain currents of thought convey the idea that babies’ crying is harmful to their brains and to their development and therefore encourage parents to never let their babies cry.
The agent implicated would be cortisol, which is the hormone of stress but also of awakening. In reality, the increase in cortisol does not occur when the child cries, but rather when the child is left to cry.
Worse still, the amount of cortisol will increase exponentially in children who are prevented from crying to evacuate the stress accumulated during the day.
The final word!
There are different situations in which your baby can cry for no apparent reason. Some of them are very simple and you can easily solve them by changing your baby’s diaper or giving him a bottle.
You can also teach your baby how to express his emotions in an appropriate way since crying is one of the first ways that babies communicate with their parents.
You should also know that it is normal for a baby to cry when he needs to be changed or when he is hungry.
If you do not want your baby to cry, try not to make him feel too much stress or anxiety and keep his environment as relaxed as possible.
Leaving your baby to ‘cry it out’ has no adverse effects on child.
Neuroendocrinology of Parental Response to Baby-Cry.